Sunday, 05 February 2012 16:56

Whether that means both Rachel and Jaimee, or just multiple sessions with Jaimee, I don't know and I don't care. A line from the Judd Apatow movie "Funny People" springs to mind. Adam Sandler plays a comic named George, who thinks he's dying. Apatow's real-life wife, Leslie Mann, plays Laura, George's former girlfriend but the true love of his life. Laura says to him, "Why did you cheat on me? I was so hot." Men are strange. We know that. Elin Nordegren: I don't know her, but I've seen her around. She's beautiful, smart, dignified. Swedish. Why did you cheat on me? I was so hot.

But Tiger did, and now he's done what he shouldn't have to do: admit it in public, just like Bill Clinton. Kenneth Starr trapped Clinton and the tabloids trapped Tiger. Both men were put in a corner where they had no choice but to confess. Many sane people will hold Clinton to a higher standard — he was the president of the United States — but Clinton has remained a beloved figure to many. I think Tiger will emerge mostly unscathed as well.

(An aside: I had always thought Tiger was so smart. Turns out, Maxwell Smart was smarter. He never cheated on the beautiful Agent 99. And how did Woods think, in this plugged-in age, that he would never get turned in? Didn't he follow the Eliot Spitzer story?)

Still, you underestimate a man's desire to have sex at your own peril. Others, men and women both, crave other things: proximity to celebrity, illicit excitement, fame no matter how it arrives. This used to be the stuff of novels. No need to make things up these days.

Things will be different for Tiger now. The racists, too numerable to count, now have more fodder, and they will hate Woods even more but continue to express it anonymously. Others will simply be disappointed in the man. But a far greater number will see Woods as more human, more interesting, less robotic, more like us. That is to say, flawed. And that will be good for Woods. Be recognized as a member of the human race, it's nice. Moralists will point to him, red-faced, finger shaking, and say, "Sinner!" But they will continue to buy Nike sneakers whenever they go on sale at SneakerTown. "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." Tough grammatically, but otherwise a pretty damn good sentiment to remember right about now.